I've got sunshine on a cloudy day! January 29, 2023


 Well, today's song is so fitting as I lived somewhat surrounded by girls and though the song is "My Girl", I think My Girls is more fitting for me.  Between Tiffany, Gusty, Maeve, Bear, Nala, Speckles, 1/2 and 1/2, and fluffy, I have a lot of girls to brighten my day.  Squirt-squirt helps too when he is not trying to kill me to get a treat.

I am trying to control my anxiousness for my upcoming scans tomorrow evening.  It really is the first true scan after some time on the current treatment regiment.  I would be pleased with stable, but I am really hopeful for shrinking tumors and for the love of all things holy NO NEW GROWTH.  I have promised myself not to over-react if I don't get the results I want, but I can't guarantee that will happen.  Cancer has been an emotional rollercoaster on my outward emotions, you should see what I'm like on the insides.  Sometimes it is unbearable within my head.

One of the things that really bothers me lately is that I worked so hard to try to get to a point where Tiffany and I could travel to Europe (especially Ireland) and across the country so she could see and experience some of the things she hasn't had the chance to and I could share with her some of the things that made such an impression on me.  Ireland and much of Europe would be shared new experiences for us.  With that said, I want her to see a giant sequoia, they put my position in the universe into perspective for me.  I want her to stand on the Oregon coast when the the tide is out and marvel at the giant beach, the rock formations, etc...  It also helped me set my perspective on things. Then there is the grand canyon, Bryce, Zion, Puget sound, Vancouver, Monterey bay, US 1 and Big Sur, etc...

So I suppose I should start planning a fly to Monterey and drive to Seattle trip :)  It is a lot of driving, but definitely worth it.  She may like see/driving up Rainer and Mt. St. Helen's.  So many things I want to share with her and I refuse to say so little time.  

Well, I have crap to do so I am going to get it done so that I can get stoned and chill today!

I love you all!

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