Upstate doldrums - April 2, 2022

 

So here we are in the first days of April.  I like that we are getting to spring and I know that it is going to be warm soon, but the constant swings of warm, cold, windy, rainy start to way on me.  I just want to step outside in a warm morning and listen to the birds.  I've enjoyed living in our rural home.  Other than some road noise in the morning, you can stand on our deck and just block out everything but the morning birds.  It's a nice perk.  The evenings with the sun setting on the deck is pretty damn awesome too.

I am doing a lot better with the after treatment days than the last time.  Still a little rough in the digestive tract, but nothing like last time.  I was pretty tired by the end of the day yesterday with the steroids wearing off, but I feel pretty good this morning.  I am going to try and be active today, but we will see how that goes.

I really have been quite positive thinking about my cancer lately.  I am trying not to let it invade my thoughts, since I feel pretty good a lot of the time, I am hoping that I am getting better.  Maybe, I am just getting used to the pain in my side and other things, but the mental change has made a difference.  

I still worry about Tiffany and the girls a lot.  I should have done a better job of getting the girls ready to be on their own, but that is water under the bridge.  I didn't want them to have to run out and start a life, struggle, the way I did.  I suppose some of that struggle made me who I am all the same, but I wanted them to have advantages I didn't.  The only thing that worries me most days is that there will be enough savings for Tiffany to help them moving forward.  However, that will not be necessary as I am going to beat this thing!

Well, time to get started with my Saturday.

Love you all!