Where do we go from here... June 12, 2022

 

Once again I really don't feel like typing this morning.  I don't feel like doing much of anything to be honest, as I am pretty numb to pleasure at the moment.  I have been enjoying the gardening or more so building out the garden areas, the side yard is coming along.  I should build something for the grapes today, but I just don't feel like it so I hope they can make a few more days until I get around to it.

I suppose the issue is that I spent most of my life in constant need for stimulus.  Always needing a new thing to do (new game, new hobby, etc...).  Being content has never been my strong suit, I've needed that constant "new thing" high to peak my interest, but never really finish anything.  I suppose that is why I am working on the gardens, I want to finish them?  Is a garden ever really finished?  If there is a god, I can't leave until the gardens are finished ;) Just one more plant here, one more bed here... ;) 

So I have until Tuesday to find out what Sloan sees on the pictures.  I find it interesting and a little scary that Guthrie did the CT but other than saying shrinking tumors is good, there was no discussion of next steps after chemo (that kind of scares me).  I like to have a plan and this chemo thing isn't working for me from a plan perspective.  There is nothing a former military person understands more than hurry up and wait, but I still hate it.

Well, going to try to get this day started.

Love you all!