There used to be a greying tower alone on the sea... February 16, 2023

 

I have been thinking a lot about the fact that the upcoming surgery could mean no cancer any longer.  I am trying not to get my hopes up, but my hopes have been the things that keep me going.  I've gone into every test know what the outcome could be and always hoping for the best.  Demanding the best I guess.  Other than the initial cancer diagnosis tests (which I was in a trance during), I have gone into every scan, test, etc... with the attitude that I  was getting better.  I will keep that attitude.

I have just one day less than a month until that surgery.  It is really starting to weigh on me.  I know Tiffany is struggling with it as well.  A lot hangs on this surgery.

I need to take off a little weight.  I have been gaining lately (which I guess isn't the worse sign as I am not having massive weight loss).  I am going to try and eat lighter today as the heavy eating has been causing me to get bloating at night.  I also have gained like 5 pounds directly on my belly.

As  you can see there isn't a hell of a lot going on right now as we are in limbo.  I think I will try and get cuttings off the MJ plants and nurse them back.  I guess I need to do something that speaks to continuing (starting plants, growing things, learning new recipes, etc...).

Ok - have to burp the jars.

I love you all!