Love will abide, Take things in stride... February 2, 2023

So that song was on Last of Us episode 3 (finally got to watching it last night).  I'd forgot how much I liked it. 

Maeve took my computer camera.  So, I guess I need to get a new one.  I did have one of the best ranked models for video conferencing and expect finding one in stock will be difficult.  As long as she is happy.  

So we are and I have good news.  I read the wrong MRI and the actual new scan shows that the tumors are still shrinking.  Not aggressively, but the tumors have gone below the 1cm measurement so changes become what are perceived as small changes are actually 40% less in size than they were.  For instance one tumor went from .54 cm-sq to .30 cm-sq which is a 44% change.  

Tomorrow I hear from the surgeon as to whether they go in for round 2 on the liver.  I am pretty certain I can take the surgery, but I want to make sure that when they go in this time they come out with some results.

I get more and more scared as this all lingers that I am getting closer to my death.  I suppose we are always creeping closer to our deaths even if we don't have cancer.  I assume with my CEA score so low that my oncologist is moderately positive on the fact that I may not have rogue cancer cells hiding elsewhere.  With that said, I get worried that the lymphatic system is hiding some as I did have a positive lymph node removed with the last surgery.  In the bunch they took there was only one cancerous.  

I am so hopeful that I can beat this thing and get some more time with my family.  I want to see Maeve get married, I want to see Gusty and Maeve find someone that loves and cherishes them as much as I love their mother.  I want to see Tiffany lifted from the burdens she now has taking care of all of us.  And I want to travel the world with Tiffany.  Like I mentioned before, I want to share things like Haystack rock and the great sequoias with her.  I wrote a little poem about haystack rock once.  I would have to look for the book it was in.

Well, I should get this day started.  

I love you all!