Come they told me... December 8, 2022


 I am going to be honest - today it is the same sweatshirt and t-shirt.  I wasn't feeling so hot yesterday so no a lot got done for my hygiene.  Such important information I know, but I guess it describes my current state of mind/affairs. 

It is funny, days like yesterday I wish I could just do what I want to at home (not work for someone else, not work at all from an occupation standpoint).  I want to fix, clean, and cook.  I want to focus on my health, etc...  However, I should take some solace in the fact that I am still healthy enough to work (such an American thing isn't it - I am healthy enough to work!  Yeah!).  

I am feeling a bit better this morning so I will try and keep my blood sugar down today so that I can feel better.  I just really tired of eating only low-carb, no sugar, etc...  It is boring, tasteless, or has a nasty fake sweetener aftertaste.  

I bitch about these things, but I feel like I am in a better place than many at this time.  I have hope after hearing about so many stage IV CRC patients living longer and surviving this.  I do get really tired of being sick at times, but more of it is the treatment than the disease I am sure of it.  I mean seriously, the ostomy, the pump, the chemo, the steroid, none of that is the cancer.  Another interesting item is that I kind of feel better than I did a year ago when I (hell everybody in the house) knew I was feeling sick and in pain.  I have good things and I need to focus on them.

Well, I have to go eat something that isn't good for me :)  and some things that are.

I love you all!

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