Here she come now sayin', "Mony, Mony"... June 21, 2023


 

I can't help of think of the next line we would all scream at a college party or bar when this song came on.  

I drank too many alcoholic drinks last night and my liver hurts.  I had 2 pints and short.  Then when I got home I drank a gin and tonic (with actual gin).  This morning, I know that I have a liver.  I also ate too much sugar last night.  I get stoned and I just can't stop grazing and the sugar is easy.

I read again about someone in the man up for cancer group losing their battle with stage IV colon cancer and it makes me so scared.  I know they post about uncontrolled tumor growth in multiple areas, but I still get scared that they were like me.  So close to no detectable disease and then - bam!  I fucking hate the worrying

On a side note, I really have become quite content.  Most days I am just neutral, pleased with everything around me.  I know that Tiffany stresses out about this stuff, but anymore, what can I really do about any of it?  I figure, it is what it is.  If it takes me, so be it, if I make it, then I will try to tell everyone about being content and not letting the small shit destroy your life.  I wasted many years worrying about the small shit.

Well, speaking of the small shit.  I need to run out and water the plants.

And speaking of that - new starter plants!


I love you all!

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

She said, she said, "You don't know shit because you've never been there"... March 24, 2024

Image
 It's been a while since I posted (I say that every post now), but I don't seem to have the morning time I used to and I am not certain why (going to work I guess).   I have been plugging along.  Getting back to the shitty routine of work and weekends, with a mix of NJ travel.  It has been since October since I had systematic chemo and I'm on my first of at least two pump breaks.  I just had liver ablations done (6 hour procedure) and they say they got everything they could see, which tells me they have been down this path before (burn out what they can see, but the little ones are still growing).   Either way, this gives me more time, and I hope they got it all.  I have scans on May 1, so I will know somethings then.  It is all just a wait and see game; which I no longer want to play. The family is doing well (I guess).  I feel like I put everyone's life in limbo, because I kind of did.  I am going to try and get my ass in gear this summer and do stuff, but we will see
Read more

I won't dance, don't ask me... August 11, 2023

That song in not on in the background of this video, but listening to the swing albums makes me think of it.  It was so funny the time I re-wrote the lyrics to talk about Maeve not napping.  I won't nap, don't ask me...  I haven't been feeling very well.  I try not to let Tiffany know, but I have been so lightheaded and dizzy combined with some nasty insides, I just feel like things are getting worse.  It could be my body is sick of the chemo.  I hope that is what the issue is and not that I have cancer in my gut or brain. I am going to try and get some work outside done today.  I bailed on work, I just can't keep my head in the game and it isn't fair to them that I just sit here staring at a screen.  If I am not working they shouldn't pay me. Well, I am going to get busy on the day. I love you all!
Read more

March 6, 2022

Image
 Feeling a little lightheaded this morning.  Still I road the stationary bike for 20 minutes so I am keeping up my trend of getting up and stretching (yoga) and then exercising.  I have been having some pain in my chest, but I think that is just the stress of knowing that I am about 1 week away from starting chemo. The chemo they are giving me is for colorectal cancer, but is associated with prolonging life but not curing my cancer.  I am going to fight like hell to be the statistical anomaly that beats this thing.  Thank God for my family as I am not certain I would not fight as hard for myself as I will for them. It is supposed to be 67 degrees today so I am looking forward to getting outside.  It wasn't nice enough to get out yesterday and clean up the dog messes, but I will get to that earlier this morning.  It is already 40+ degrees outside so I am looking forward to having some windows open today. Squirt is currently sleeping on my right arm. He is such a baby.  I don't h
Read more