I really have to get more sweatshirts. In a couple of days we will be heading back into NYC to get my liver ablated, again. This is the 3rd time. 3rd times a charm? I am not sure how I feel. I spent all day Sunday getting things done outside so I still can burst some energy out, but it leaves me exhausted. I don't have the energy I had just a few months. I have started another blog, but public - I am not sure why I am driven to do these things. I have always been an introvert with a need for attention I guess (it's strange, I know). Well, I don't have a lot to say this morning outside of the fact that I am beginning to realize that I spent way too much time in my life thinking about me and it is sad that it has taken me this long to realize that life is about everyone else. I love you all!
Tiffany is amazing! I know that she doesn't feel well as she has an infection in her kidney due to her stones. She continues to take care of me regardless. In the morning, I am generally able to get around without issue (except for the pain in my side), but by afternoon I am generally really tired. More tired than you should be from just sitting around. Eating zaps every bit of strength out of me for some reason leaving me extremely lightheaded. I try to hide how bad I am feeling after eating as I know it upsets her. I have a lot of hope about upcoming treatment. I expect to start on chemo as everything I read suggests they won't go after the tumors in my liver via surgery. What I fear is that if the chemo doesn't slow the progression of the liver metastatic disease that I will get real sick in the coming year. I had an ultrasound a year ago that didn't show any lesions on the liver and a year later I have several. Hopefu...
It really is a different day, just same sweatshirt and beanie. Today is World Cup start day! Very exciting. I hate to say it, but I wonder if I will be around for the next one. Let's not talk about that. It was also bag change day. We will be off to NJ tomorrow early (7 AM) so that we can get there in time for a last minute MRI the surgeon wanted. I can guarantee he is going to want me to do chemo for one more cycle (3 months) and then scan again and re-evaluate. It is a bit of a double-edged sword with me, because I want those tumors out of me, but I also don't want to go through surgery and recovery with them not being able to do anything. At the moment, I feel pretty good. I am still getting used to being active with the ostomy. It feels weird and you always know it is there, it isn't like you ever forget about it. I was thinking this morning that there are a lot of things you learn about yourself when you are s...
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