As I was walking down the street one day... April 13, 2024


 

I have been in a really bad funk lately.  I am not sure why I lost a lot of my hope, but I suppose it is just a function of time.  I have had too much time to think about it, I have been in the limbo between cancer and no cancer for a while, and there doesn't seem to be an end in sight.  

I suppose I had mentioned that the ablations were a success in the minds of the radiologist, but they got "everything they could see" and that last line makes all the difference.  I should be celebrating the fact that I have had all this time to be with Tiffany and the girls, and don't get me wrong, I cherish that fact that I have had time and as I have written before, I have never felt so loved.

It seems obvious that I should keep this blog up better as the writing is cathartic.  I just lack a serious amount of motivation and it has to do with the constant waiting.  I never know where I am at in this process.  Someone asked me at work what the oncologist thought my chances were and I told them that they don't tell you that anymore.  It really is just a wait and see game.  I suppose, I feel a little bad for the oncologist as most of their patients succumb to cancer.  It must suck to know that the majority of people you treat will never be cured.  With that said, I should be happy that I have had this time and have had a chance.

Ok, I am going to get eating and this Speckles cat smells like poop so I am getting her off my lap :)

I love you all!

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