Midnight on the water... November 20, 2024


 I am glowing from the monitor light.  I wonder how bad that much light has been for my eyes over the years?  That made me laugh - like my monitor hurting my eyes is a concern right now.

We leave for NYC, again, today.  I think I mentioned in yesterday's post that this will be my 3rd ablation.  So as the count goes:

  • 2 port placements
  • 3 ablations
  • 2 major abdominal surgeries
    • Colon/Liver resections
    • Lymph node biopsies
    • Hepatic pump placement
    • Ileostomy and reversal
    • The joys of liver drains
  • 2 years and 10 months of chemo (with some breaks) - I've lost count.
When I type it out like that it seems like I have been through some shit, but honestly all I feel is love.  You all have been not only supportive, but you have been my world.  

I'm worried about this one.  Some of it is that I haven't felt well and the other is that if they don't get it all this time or it comes back, I don't know what the next step is as I am exhausting my treatment options.  My body really can't handle much more chemo (I'll do it, but it won't be pretty) and they can only burn my liver so many times.

However, I will continue to keep plugging forward as I hold out hope that I will get through this shit.

I love you all!

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