Maybe I didn't love you... October 10, 2024


 

I definitely don't write as often as I used to.  Things don't change much when you get deep into treatment.  Time seems to be a gift and an enemy for the most part.  I am in break from treatment post ablation, but have no idea where I am at from a cancer perspective.  Believe it or not, my bowels have gotten better (of sorts),but my hernias are annoying and I get that stupid pain in my upper right side under my rib cage.  

I suppose I should be grateful that I have been able to take care of the family this long, but I am not sure that my cancer isn't destroying it as well.  I didn't see it as much with my father, but now with my mother being sick, I hate that old age and illness become a burden.  You work so hard your whole life to give to yourself and your family only to find at the end of it, you are a burden.

I sometimes miss being younger, I sometimes miss being middle age, but I don't think anyone ever misses being old and broken.

Well, no reason to depress myself.

I love you all!

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